a heart is captive

a heart is captive

Wednesday, November 9, 2016


After the election news last night I felt sick inside; my stomach turned and I could vomit. I also felt incredible sadness. I am in shock actually, because all my ideals, my beliefs have been proved wrong beyond any doubt.
I was always proud of my country thinking there was basic humanity here at least the regular people were at heart kind and caring. I have been ignoring the signs for a while I know that now.

After 9/11 things got very bad for me. I was harassed at work and lost my job. My career was destroyed on purpose by the same people who voted in Trump yesterday. So I have been dealing with this stress since 2002.
But I never lost my faith that Americans were down deep decent people. Until last night when they elected a racist hate-monger with no grace or class. Just a blunt sledge hammer personality which sees every thing as something to be destroyed for his perverted pleasure. He is the boy who tortures puppies, he sets ants and butterflies on fire with a magnifying glass with happiness.

It made no difference to those who voted for him that he was disrespectful to women, hated huge groups of people…We see his adult children spoiled, above the commoners, They grind their boots on our hands while we pick up their leavings in desperation.

I now see with eyes open that there is no more American ideal; no American dream except greed and avarice. Money for the rich is good and if a person is poor he must die to decrease his use of resources.
I am sad, and sad is such a little pathetic word for how deeply I feel this loss of country, of ideal of what I thought my grandparents immigrated to give a better life to their children and grandchildren. It is such profound deeply gut grabbing feeling. I am sick. I am bereft of any hope. Let the world burn now. I no longer live.

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