By Abdul Qudus humorist writer
>Sharif: Hello dehati aurat(village woman) how are you ? Manmohan: Hello chubby, the toady of Zia the hick, what is aurat ? Sharif: Oh, you know matiar(Woman in Punjabi), but our ISI goofed off ! Matiars do not have beard and turbans. By the way who gave you this turban, our Talibans must have made a mistake. Manmohan: Just like Talibans I like turban, but I do not like black & white, I prefer blue. Sharif: Oh, I see; can we talk about some business, like Kashmir ? Manmohan: Of course, yes we banyas(hindu businessmen) like business, I assume you are telling me you have decided to accept us as your most favorite business partner. Sharif: Not that yet, I was talking about Kashmir. Manmohan: Oh, Mian Jee you are such a charming joker ! But for a young man your memory is not good. Sharif: What do you mean Sardar Jee ? Manmohan: Pssssss, I am not a real Sardar Jee, this turban and beard is a disguise to show the world we respect & treat our minorities equally well. Sharif: OK, ok, I did not get your point about my memory. Manmohan: Oh, Mian saheb no one told you Kashmir was sold by Britons to Raja(my great great granduncle) for 45 00,000.00 rupees. Sharif: Now I remember in my school an old teacher told us that, he also said Kashmiris were also sold with the land. But how Civilized Britons could have sold Kashmiris too, I thought they abolished slavery long time ago. Manmohan: Oh, Mian saheb you make me laugh, Kashmiris were not sold as slaves, they were part of the package deal, they are called surfs. Sharif: So what are surfs ? Manmohan: My poor dear, I can not teach you the Russian history; you better get a crash course in history from a professor from Jinnah university. Sharif: Do you mean Quaid-e-Azam university ? Manmohan: Yes, that one, he was not really a Quaid(leader), otherwise you would be following him. Sharif: Then you think it is not an issue ? Manmohan: You got it chap. Listen I got to go, I have to report this to Sonia & her cohorts, you know I am just a show boy. Sharif: Just like that ? Manmohan: Yes, and please bring the handover papers of what you call AJK (Pakistani Kashmir).
Sharif: But, but.... Manmohan: No but, but.... just be an honest Muslim and give our land back to us, our official western boundary is River Indus. Sharif: Thank you for being so open minded, and understanding...... Manmohan: Any time my boy, we have some other issues to resolve too. Sharif: Alright sir, I will go and talk to ISI and Talibans, they are the rulers of Pakistan, I am just the figurehead. Manmohan: We know that, we have been paying them for quite sometime, bye.... Sharif: Bye, thank you for enlightening me.
to be continued.